The Need for Assisting Foster Parents

 

Nearly half of all new foster parents step away from fostering in their first or second year. This occurs because foster parents often lack the support needed to help the children they are called to serve. As one example, the daily stipend foster parents receive only tends to cover about half of the typical cost of caring for a child. There is no way around it;, foster parenting is hard work. For this reason, we providefree resources like counseling, a monthly support group,  and a respite home for foster and adoptive parents. 

 

 

Foster parents also tend to lack resources for emotional support and specialized training. The Foster & Adoptive Care Coalition in St. Louis, Missouri, has invested resources in both of these areas and has seen their foster family retention rate rise to 97%. Training like this helps foster parents understand their foster kids’ experience and respond to behavioral patterns. 

 

Research indicates that the wellbeing of parents has a significant impact on foster and adoptive children. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, children and youth who have been through trauma need stable, nurturing relationships. In fact, this is the most important piece of their support system as they adapt to a new home. As parents strive to provide stability for their foster and adopted children, they need to keep up their own energy levels as well. The hard work of healing is difficult for parents, just as it is for children, so we provide special resources for foster and adoptive parents. 

 

While counseling for the foster child is covered by the state, counseling for biological children in the same home or for the couple is not covered. And if the foster child is adopted, counseling is no longer covered. Loving Shepherd Ministries covers this need for free. 

 

Mothers who need a little extra encouragement can join our monthly support group in Bluffton, Indiana. Here they can gather with women who experience similar struggles under the guidance of an experienced leader. Each meeting includes a devotional, a short teaching, and a structured connection time.  

 

The value of meeting with other foster and adoptive parents is immense, as it offers a safe outlet to discuss challenges and joys. The Child Welfare Information Gateway strongly emphasizes the value of support groups for adoptive parents. Because of the unique lifestyle and challenges experienced by foster and adoptive parents, parents can benefit greatly from interacting with other parents in similar situations. 

 

Another resource we offer for foster and adoptive parents is a free stay in our respite home. Guests can enjoy rural Indiana scenery and take time to recharge emotionally, spiritually, and relationally. The house where they stay is equipped with basic toiletries, a fully stocked kitchen, games, books, and puzzles. Foster and adoptive parents can stay for how ever long they need and return to their homes with new energy and clarity on how to care for their children. 

The Need for Quality Counseling for Children

 

A foster child’s mental development is heavily affected by the unstable home life that child has experienced. This results in unhealthy coping mechanisms. A report by AFCARS found neglect, abuse, and abandonment to be common issues leading to children ending up in the foster system.   

 

One in four foster youth are likely to develop PTSD, which is double the likelihood for U.S. veterans. Over half live with behavioral or social-emotional challenges, and many also struggle with attachment and separation issues. Each of these requires frequent and qualified care that the average foster home cannot provide without a support structure like ours.

 

Any child or youth coming out of a messy home background faces many challenges. For starters, one in four foster youth are likely to develop PTSD, which is double the likelihood for U.S. veterans. Over half live with behavioral or social-emotional challenges, and many also struggle with attachment and separation issues. Each of these requires frequent and qualified care that the average foster home cannot provide without a support structure. 

 

Children who have experienced abuse and neglect are vulnerable to many challenges in the future, including consequences related to physical health, psychological health,  and behavior. ChildWelfare.gov says that comprehensive, trauma-informed care is the main avenue to help children who are in this position.  

 

In trauma-informed care, trained professionals recognize a child’s history of trauma and walk through the potential implications. Counselors can learn about the child’s context and consider the strengths of a child’s present setting and caregivers. The main goal is to understand, rather than fix, the child. This is a holistic care model that takes into account the child’s surroundings, history, current struggles, and strengths. Parents can then move forward to create a safer and happier environment for their adopted and fostered children. 

 

LSM provides free counseling for foster families in northeast Indiana to help them overcome challenges and find a path forward. Our counseling can help both children and adults understand the struggles that come with trauma and find healing.  

 

LSM helps families of foster and adoptive children to recognize and communicate how various traumas may be impacting them. This even includes the trauma of simply being in the foster and adoption system. LSM counselors use EMDR, play therapy, and improved communication and understanding to guide foster and adoptive youth and their families toward healing.  

 

 

Questions? Reach out to Adam Carroll at adam@loving-shepherd.org.  

 

Adam is a Credentialed Sexual Abuse Youth Clinician (CSAYC) and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT). He also has training in EMDR. 

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